I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
