Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
When are your genitals available?
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
