You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
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