but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
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