Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Randomize
