haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Randomize
