i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize