I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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