I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I want to fling myself into the sun
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
