from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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