I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize
