Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
it was like eating out sand paper
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner