ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
You dont lie about slip and slides
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
