Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
I want to be your penis for a week.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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