She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
