I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
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