Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize