i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
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