Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Randomize
