false alarm. still invincible.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Randomize