I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
then he tried to convert me to islam
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
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