I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
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