hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
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