I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Randomize
