I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
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