I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize