I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
