Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize
