Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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