the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize