I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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