5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
Randomize