you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
