how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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