i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
