she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
its liver damage thursday
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
