Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize
