just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
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