I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
