I just saw a hot homeless man
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize