I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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