Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
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