Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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