my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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