i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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