I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Randomize
