Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
