Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
