Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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