"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Randomize
