honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Randomize
