I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Randomize
